Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Clifford the Big Red Fraud

Apparently, this clifford is a dog that has grown to the size of Kong because emily loved him so. This abomination then drives the howards out of their swank brownstone because obviously they can't afford the bulldozer it would require to scoop his messes. After hbomb and i sat thru perhaps the worst, most tone deaf theme song in television history, we settled in for what i hoped what would be a quiet, blissful 30 minutes of mild anesthesia. Today's episode was entitled 'fishing lessons' but in all actuality, it was a lesson learned it shotty character development and stereotypically reinforced gender roles. Seems that charlie likes to fish and promises to show emily how. Emily then of course has dreams about it and shows up the next day for her lesson- but then just like a man, charlie forgets his commitment and blows her off to fly his buddy's glider. Emily drops everything to change plans for her prince and they head to the park to fly the plane.

What are we teaching our kids here? Should emily also keep 5 paces behind charile? Deplorable. Oh, the heartbreak continues, when emily goes out and buys several books on fishing because charlie reschedules for the next day-Guess what ? Charlie hears about the hot new rope swing being put up by emilys jealous, manipulative 'friend' jenna- Ain't it always the way ? Teaching guys to be wary of the slightly less attractive best friend always 3rd wheeling it is a true life lesson to be learned, but isn't this slightly advanced information??

Emily constantly cries on an animal's shoulder that in real life (or in a bruckheimer film) would have been caged and experimented on by the government in the first frame.

Emily ends up alone fishing by herself, putting her sandwich on her line as bait. I can't even begin to get into everything wrong with this cluster so i'll just stop here. But you should know Charlie finally shows up, offers a half assed apology you know he doesn't mean, and then instructs Emily on the man's oldest and most studied craft-LYING-Thanks charile, go ahead and tell them we're not really listening about their day as well. I will say that at least the show instructs children to catch and release. You would never want to eat something as precious and as adorable as a bass.

i still don't know why clifford was even in this episode or why he's around at all
and hbomb was infuriated 90 seconds in- we switched back to college football which works so much better on all levels -


  1. You haven't moved on to Yo Gabba Gabba yet? I hear it's what the cool babies are into.

  2. dude, be careful on woot for sure! i have two sets of woot off lights and 4 monkeys. lol.

    also, yo gabba gabba is the freakiest show i have ever seen. its for old wanna be 80's flashback hipsters with beer bellies and kids.