Monday, October 12, 2009

original sin

original sin- i was thinking about how the bible says adam and eve were the ones that ruined things for all of creation. Given my sense of false entitlement and expert rants of things which are not fair, i realized this is easily the most unfair thing of all-even more unfair than tx summers, strokes, big ears, and stubborn belly fat. So we are all sinners because adam was weak and eve was deceitful-they were the gateway drug to the hell we call the earth as it is today. But you know i wasn't just occurred to me i can't fly and wrestle sharks and walk around naked with small ears and live on fruit and grass because of something this idiot did a long long time ago- if God put me in the garden of eden and said 'ok here's the deal--you're 25 forever you're supernatural -i've made a bunch of badass animals, mostly are bigger than you but don't worry, you say the word and they'll bring you a beer-the weather today will be, well i was thinking 72 with a breeze but if you'd like something different, just holler(after all we can talk ANYTIME YOU WANT- I CREATED YOU JUST FOR THAT) here's a place to hang out that you would have probably scheduled off for vacation time and spent 1000s of dollars (or whatever your currency is) to get to -btw without bugs that bite you yes God that sounds awesome that's really all i need..... beauty and harmony and communion with you -thanks THERE IS NO WAY I WOULD EVER MESS THIS UP and then God being as benevolent as he is looks down and says, hmmmm you know as good as this is-i mean i am God and i did create this thing in my own image -well it would be good if he could have maybe a partner on his level -i can tell he gets bored when i try and explain things and God knows (that being me) i can't possibly dumb it down more than i already have well ,here you go -BAM a naked 22 year old woman that is yours forever -no dating no puberty no checking the caller id involved- just bliss all i ask is that you not eat the one piece of fruit in the center that i have made you conveniently allergic to anyway (apples make my throat itch) i think i could have made it work THOUGH I WAS NEVER GIVEN A SHOT and it's just unfair


  1. I'm not understanding your visuals on this one bro

  2. I never knew you had such an ear complex.